[WORDS By: Sadiq Ali] Picture this day. The first day of school at your very first school. You have on brand-new everything. You’re smiling, happy, slightly nervous but your mom and/or dad is right there. Then you walk inside those big doors full of even bigger dreams. Your first teacher then asks the magic question: “what do you want to be when you grow up??” No other single question in our collective consciousness is as ethereal, emotive, palpable and utterly terrifying as this. The range of emotions is almost exclusively based on whether you have attempted any what you thought of, or if you haven’t thought of this question since that day. Terror if you haven’t. Giddiness at the possibility; anxiety because you’re still working. I submit to you that this is one of the greatest unanswered questions in our lives that we ALL have the ability to answer whenever we want. All it takes is a little thing that we have to literally unlearn from our time as children how to use: our imagination. Napoleon Hill calls it “the creative power of the soul” and teaches that it is the foundation for all self-improvement and ultimate success because before it happens, you must, must, must imagine it first. How were we robbed of this key to life? Who did this to us? And most importantly, how do we reclaim it? We hear over and over again (sometimes) well-meaning phrases like “get real” or “stop dreaming” coupled with lies like “dreams don’t pay the bills” or “get your head out of the clouds” and countless other thoughts, phrases and general mistruths about the nature of one of life’s greatest assets. Flashback again to the answers we gave to that question on the first day of school: doctor, lawyer, scientist are great of course, but what about the others?? I’m talking dragon slayer, Queen of the Earth, King of America, race car driver, stunt driver, stunt man, astronaut, chocolate factory owner, ninja (my son’s favorite), super famous dancer, actor or singer, demolition guy, cowboy, super hero, time traveler and soooo many others. These are just a few of chosen professions we would do if we only used our imaginations. And...
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What is a True Friend [WORDS By: Sadiq Ali] We often times hear the word friend being thrown around and most usually on social networks. Because of the pervasiveness and ubiquitous nature of these networks, many people have, unfortunately, began to use the word ‘friend’ interchangeably with less impactful and traditionally more sterile terms like follower, subscriber or connection. These words couldn’t be further from the definition, in my humble opinion, of what a true should be to us. It has been said that friends are the family we choose and this remains one of my favorites thoughts on the subject. If we can choose, are we making as deliberate a choice as we do with something a tad less important like, say, our shoes for the day? Or how about what/where we will eat lunch? Life-changing decisions I know. But what I’m really referring to is a specific set of characteristics of what a true friend is and what a true friend isn’t. I’ll start by saying it loud and clear that a true friend isn’t one that constantly strokes your ego. And please keep in mind that being mindful and conscious of one’s feelings isn’t the same as never delivering any constructive feedback or tough love. Surrounding yourself with “yes men” or “yes women” is a sure fire way to guarantee mediocrity in great abundance in your life. A true friend also doesn’t support you when you are blatantly wrong, behaving recklessly or placing yourself or others in jeopardy. A true will probably back you up in the moment, just enough so you are not injured or hurt, but will surely tell you about yourself later. On the other hand a true friend also won’t discourage you from trying something risky that has a potentially life altering reward on the other side, just because you have never done or even attempted this task or project before. They will instead offer encouragement, confidence reinforcing tidbits, and may even join in to help make sure you don’t back out. In other words they stretch you and force you to become better. All too often it is the people closest to us that inadvertently and unintentionally plant seeds of self-doubt...
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[WORDS By: Sadiq Ali] Now before we go and get all technical and men especially, all funny acting because I said diary, please feel free to exchange “diary” with “journal”. Now onwards! But the psychological, practical and overall virtues of beginning and maintaining a journal are so numerous I don’t know why I didn’t start journaling sooner. This quick piece is all about why you need to start one today, no matter what you call it. The ‘journal journey’ started for me almost one full year ago. I had just started a men’s group where we meet regularly and discuss all manner of topics, and especially, how we push each other to be better daily. The suggestion was raised during one of our early meetings and it just clicked for me and made perfect sense. There are some thoughts you never share with anyone else, and some you have never even shared with you. Where do you end up sharing these innermost thoughts? Chances are you simply don’t. As a result, the necessary clarity to move on, problem solving to act or simply healing from not so great situations just doesn’t happen. This leads to all sorts of internal issues, and especially for men, strengthens our commitment and resolve to non-communication. Really healthy huh? But the awesome thing is that everyone can reap the benefits of nine year-old little girls everywhere and their diaries. And speaking of nine year old little girls, did you ever wonder why they are so in touch with their emotions?? It’s because they both write down every emotion experienced AND talk about them with their BFFs. Somewhere between then and now, we learned to do neither as adults, and as a result some of us are really messed up. So if we aren’t going to communicate with our significant other, therapist or BFF, then we had better talk to ourselves. This is where the journal comes into play. I’ve written about many situations in my personal life, business dealings and a variety of other topics and each time walk away with a great sense of resolve and lucidity that I lacked before putting pen to paper. There are also a bunch of other added bonuses. For...
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